I’m finally watching Adventure Time and man, I wasn’t prepared for that famous “Sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something” quote being immediately followed by “Are you ready for some serious plastic surgery?” as they start a clinic with no training

I know people on tumblr looove stories of underwater cave diving, but I haven't seen anyone talk about nitrogen narcosis aka "raptures of the deep"

basically when you want to get your advanced scuba certification (allowing you to go more than 60 feet deep) you have to undergo a very specific test: your instructor takes you down past the 60+ foot threshold, and she brings a little underwater white board with her.

she writes a very basic math problem on that board. 6 + 15. she shows it to you, and you have to solve it.

if you can solve it, you're good. that is the hardest part of the test.

because here's what happens: there is a subset of people, and we have no real idea why this happens only to them, who lose their minds at depth. they're not dying, they're not running out of oxygen, they just completely lose their sense of identity when deep in the sea.

a woman on a dive my instructor led once vanished during the course of the excursion. they were diving near this dropoff point, beyond which the depth exceeded 60 feet and he'd told them not to go down that way. the instructor made his way over to look for her and found a guy sitting at the edge of the dropoff (an underwater cliff situation) just staring down into the dark. the guy is okay, but he's at the threshold, spacing out, and mentally difficult to reach. they try to communicate, and finally the guy just points down into the dark, knowing he can't go down there, but he saw the woman go.

instructor is deep water certified and he goes down. he shines his light into the dark, down onto the seafloor which is at 90 feet below the surface. he sees the woman, her arms locked to her sides, moving like a fish, swimming furiously in circles in the pitch black.

she is hard to catch but he stops her and checks her remaining oxygen: she is almost out, on account of swimming a marathon for absolutely no reason. he is able to drag her back up, get her to a stable depth to decompress, and bring her to the surface safely.

when their masks are off and he finally asks her what happened, and why was she swimming like that, she says she fully, 100% believed she was a mermaid, had always been a mermaid, and something was hunting her in the dark 👍

Iron Lung
something a bit spookier

mold poisoning stories

Planet Zoo guest thoughts have a very distinctive Energy. I don’t know how to describe it but i love it

plastic bag floating in the pacific ocean: ahhh im so worthless…my dreams of entering the stomach of a marine animal could never be realized…..

leatherback sea turtle: a transparent floating mass in the water….a delicious jellyfish perchance 😳

guy who doesn’t like turn-based rpgs: let me be clear, i do NOT like turn-based rpgs, fundamentally. but i’m writing this review becau

CREATURE????

Queer music is impossible to define because we are not a monolith and we all have our own tastes and styles but it sure is not harry styles and taylor swift

oops

I love lying to kids. It's so fun. My coworker's daughter said she speaks 2 languages and I said I spoke 17,000 and she narrowed her eyes at me and was like "... no you don't" and it was the cutest thing.

The last time I saw her I told her I was a "half-magician" that can only do 50% of a trick, and I showed her how I can tear a piece of paper in two but can't make it come back together, and she got soooo annoyed with me. Absolutely adorable. Lying to children is the best